Proof that I Am Defective (Part 1/259)

• I walked into the revolving door at my L stop this morning
• I thought it was Friday this whole time
• I haven't bought groceries in approx. 3 weeks and am subsisting on saltines
• I experienced a classic case of public female hysteria and cried while witnessing a hug
• I let out a yelp when I got scared of my own shadow
• I fell asleep standing up in the line at Dunkin Donuts
• I witnessed a hug
But, most of all...
• I accidentally sold my bed 2 weeks before I'm set to move and am now living on a couch